Keith Malek

Bus A Move

“…one of those quiet heroes we have all across America. They’re not famous. Their names are not in the newspapers, but each and every day they work hard. They aren’t seeking the limelight. All they try to do is just do the right thing.” — President Barack Obama, November 3, 2008 Due to construction, the […]

Spare Me

As a writing prompt, I chose to answer the following question from Wes Hazard’s Questions For Terrible People: 250 Questions You’ll Be Ashamed To Answer. Pop Quiz: Would you rather be beaten to death with: a) a lead pipe, b) an Academy Award statue c) a bowling pin? Explain your reasoning in detail. I would […]

Wishy Washy

Anne Shea, a woman that I don’t know and am not even Facebook “friends” with, posted this ad in a Facebook group: Free to a loving home. Nearly new washing machine! PM me for details please! This was my response: Anne, I’m contacting you because I’m interested in the washing machine. However, I also want […]

Craigslist Missed Connections: Whole Foods Checkout Line

Whole Foods checkout line–Sat. 8:30pm in the snow and sparkles–w4m (Harlem/Morningside) It was sweetly obvious, you in a hat and glasses glimpsing me, me in my hat and glasses smiling back. My sister chatting away on her phone trying to create enough distraction so we could talk. Some ruse about a lost glove. A jumbled […]

I Don’t Know Why This Keeps Happening To Me, But I Love It

Once again, I found someone’s drivers license (as well as his EBT card) on the train. You might recall that this has happened to me once before, which I chronicled on here in my letter titled “Dear Roanirt.” Anyway, I googled this man’s address, and found out that he lives in a housing project in […]

I’m Removing A Lot of Posts From This Blog

I’ve decided that in 2018, I will be entering a lot of my writing into competitions. In many of these contests, the rules state that the writing can’t be published anywhere else. Sometimes, that even includes personal blogs, so a lot of my posts that you’ve seen on here will no longer be here. No, […]

50,000 People Run 26.2 Miles Despite Having Access To Cars, Trains, and Buses

NEW YORK CITY– An estimated fifty-thousand people from seventy different countries ran through all five boroughs of New York City on Sunday, despite the fact that cars, trains, and buses exist. The misguided mob met at the foot of the Verrazano-Narrows Bridge in Staten Island and didn’t stop running until they reached Central Park hours […]