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Actor Works As An Extra Despite Hangover

 

NEW YORK CITY– On Thursday, Keith Malek went to Nevada Smith’s, a bar located in Manhattan on 12th Street and 3rd Ave. “I went there with the intention of having one or two beers,” said Malek, “but then a friend of mine started buying me shots of Jameson, and it all went downhill from there.” Malek subsequently suffered from a hangover. But despite that hangover, Malek heroically served as an extra on the daytime soap opera One Life To Live. In a scene that was filmed on the set at a restaurant called Rodi’s, Malek walked up to another extra and pretended to talk to her, leaving director Larry Carpenter in awe. “When I’m directing an episode, I’m supposed to be focusing on what the actors are doing, not what the extras are doing,” said Carpenter, “but with the level of charisma that Malek exuded while standing in the background, I just couldn’t take my eyes off of him.” In fact, Carpenter fears that Malek might have been too good, saying, “If our viewers at home catch on to his charisma and raw talent, no one is ever going to pay attention to the main characters ever again.”

When Carpenter was informed that Malek had been hung over at the time, he responded, “No way! That’s impossible! When he stood in the background, it was one of the most commanding performances I’ve ever seen in the history of television, film, or theater. To be able to do that with a hangover, well, it’s just not possible.” Malek attributes his amazing performance to “years of intensive study and well-crafted technique.” “Let’s not forget that there have been many people throughout history that have overcome disabilities and accomplished great feats,” said a modest Malek. “Beethoven went deaf when he was in his thirties, and yet he continued to write some of the world’s greatest music. John Milton became blind at age 43, but when on to write Paradise Lost. Joan of Arc suffered from narcolepsy, and she led the French armies to victory over the English at Orleans in 1429. Helen Keller went blind and deaf at nineteen months, but mastered five languages and wrote six books. Yes, I did extra work on One Life To Live with a hangover, but I’m certainly not the first person with a physical disability to have accomplished something remarkable.”

Despite his praise of Malek’s performance, when Larry Carpenter was asked whether or not Malek would now be rewarded with a speaking role, Carpenter laughed and said, “Fuck no!”

 

 

March 21, 2007

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