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Did Keith Malek Fake His Death? Bearded Look-Alike Spotted In Paris

 

PARIS– Two unconfirmed reports have stated that Keith Malek might be alive and living in Paris. Eve Blackwater, an American tourist, claims that she saw Malek sitting on a bench in the Butte Monmartre, next to Sacre Coeur, writing in a notebook. “He had a beard and was wearing sunglasses,” said Blackwater, “but at one point, he briefly took off the sunglasses, and that’s when I recognized him.” Another American tourist by the name of Alan Treacy also spotted Malek in the Butte Monmartre. He said that Malek had sunglasses on, but that he didn’t have a beard. “I don’t know why famous people always think that no one is going to recognize them just because they’re wearing sunglasses,” said Treacy. He added, “Just to confirm that it was him, I asked him if he had the time. He looked at his wristwatch, and he quoted George Carlin by saying, ‘It’s either 6:15 or Mickey Mouse has a hard-on.’ I could tell by his voice that it was him.”

An American tourist in Paris snapped this photo of a man who many believe to be Keith Malek.

 

Some are skeptical. Tom Szaniawski, Malek’s literary agent, was with Malek when he fell off of the Brooklyn Bridge. “I saw his body hit the water,” said Szaniawski. “Unless he’s David Blaine, I don’t know how he could have faked his own death.” But those who are close to Malek believe that the possibility is quite plausible. “About four years ago, I saw him reading a book entitled, How To Completely Disappear & Never Be Found,” said his long time friend, Matt O’Talloran. “I borrowed it from him. Ironically, the book will never be found, because I lost it.”

 

 

October 11, 2006

 

 

 

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