BROOKLYN– After flipping through the channels while exercising on the elliptical machine at the Prospect Park YMCA, twenty-eight-year-old Keith Malek finally decided on Tom & Jerry, a decision that filled him with no embarrassment whatsoever. “At first, I tried to read a book, but it became difficult after a while, so I turned on the TV that’s attached to the machine,” said Malek. “Not surprisingly, there was nothing on, so I finally chose the Cartoon Network.”
There was a scene in the cartoon in which Tom, who was in hot pursuit of Jerry, accidentally ran into a wall. Although he didn’t find it to be funny, Malek, who suffers from a wide variety of psychological disorders, made it a point to laugh really loudly. Enjoying the looks on people’s faces, Malek laughed approximately thirty-five times throughout the cartoon show. This created a vast amount of fear in his fellow gym members, which worked to his advantage. “When I work out, I like to have plenty of room,” he said, “I don’t want anyone to be within three machines of me.” Since everyone in the gym made it a point to stand at least fifteen feet away from him, this plan obviously worked nicely for Malek. “Every time someone was about to get on a machine, I started laughing like a hyena, and they walked away,” he said.
He eventually spotted a gorgeous brunette, and only then did he stop laughing. “There was an opportunity for her to be on the machine next to mine,” said Malek. “And suddenly, Tom & Jerry wasn’t nearly as funny.”
March 23, 2007